On the Road -- V's Wednesday Run, or The Run Where I Nearly Lost My Sh**, er Stuff.

Not every run is great. Factors in the universe sometimes conspire to send your best intentions and best efforts through the wringer. This can include stuff that's out of your control, like hot weather, cold weather, wet weather, windy weather, and even not-windy weather. This also can include stuff that is within your control, such as making poor nutrition choices for the day (or three) prior to your run, an ingrained resistance to properly cooling down and stretching on a regular basis, faulty or worn-out equipment, and (my fave) a lack of proper sleep. Sometimes, on those magical days, you are smacked with the fallout from factors you both can and cannot control. Welcome to my Wednesday run.

It's amazing what the first mile in any run will reveal to you. My first few steps revealed that

1. I like to sleep in too much. Waking up and running at 12:45 on an 83 degree day doesn't even look good on paper. 
2. My Saucony Virratas are very, very near their point of retirement. I love these shoes -- I really do -- but my kneecaps are starting to get kind of pissed at them. I'm fast approaching 250 miles, and this is my first experience with zero-drop, minimalist shoes. It's been great so far, with just a few nagging ouches, but I soon will need to bronze these shoes and put them on the mantel. 
3. I had to poop. Let me say right now that I am quite proud that it took four whole blog posts before either I or Sole Sister M mentioned poop. But, we've now reached the point of no return. We're runners. We occasionally will talk about poop. Actually, I believe that as an adult who runs, you'll never be more concerned about poop, unless you are potty training a toddler. Hello? Are you still there? Oh, OK, good.

So, there is your scene setter: I'm tired, it's hot (and humid), my knees are mad at me though I look fab in these Sauconys, and I'm experiencing the beginnings of certain abdominal distress that could basically end my run in an heartbeat. Everybody poops, yes, but hopefully not on the side of the road.

 

Um, yes. It was a bit humid On the Road today.

 
And, this falls under "factor you can control." My stomach was in the preconcert warmup to a grand borborygmic chorus (thanks, Mr. Sole Sister M), and it was all my fault. Nutritionally speaking, I've been a bad, bad girl (thanks, Fiona Apple), and the apparent purpose of this run was to teach me to make better choices. "But you made all those meals, ahead of time," I hear you say. Well, yes. Yes, I did. And then, I visited my Mom and Aunt. And ate McD's on the way there. And had delicious Gorgonzola cheese drizzled with local honey over tiny toasts. And a couple of cookies. And white sangria. And a glass of pinot noir (just one!). And kettle corn. And pumpernickel and onion pretzel sticks with whole-grain mustard. And leftover Chinese shrimp with vegetables (I'm thrifty; it had to be eaten). And a strawberry margarita. And tortilla chips with salsa. And one more strawberry margarita. And a whole fruit ice pop. And another one. (And one more.) And then I stopped eating, because it was time for bed. 

So, it's no wonder that the first few steps were very troubling, intestinally speaking. It's a hard lesson, but one that I will remember. And, no one is perfect. It is using my courage to share with you all the bad things I ate and letting you know, it's OK really. We'll get up and run another day and it will be fantastic. Bad or less-than-ideal runs can teach you things and also help you better appreciate the days when things go well. Some days, you'll catch your toe and trip over everything, even after your running partner says, "Whatever you do, don't trip." (For the record, this always happens to me. Please, if you are a kind-hearted soul and see me at a race, don't say this to me. Perhaps tell me, "I hope you fall and break your face. I might just sprout wings and fly instead...) Some days, you'll know that the sweat you taste on your skin is from last night's margarita. Some days, you'll nearly gag over the Hello (dead) Kitty roadkill that's been baking in the sun for hours since you got out on the road so late (Sole Sister tip: GO OUT EARLY WHILE THE ROADKILL IS STILL REFRIGERATED).

Holy OMG. What WAS that animal?

What you need to remember is the rule of  Dead Last Finish. Math friends, you'll recognize it as: DLF>DNF>DNS
"Dead Last Finish (DLF) is greater than Did Not Finish (DNF), which trumps Did Not Start (DNS)." ilovetorun.org
Always take pride in knowing that you started. You got out there, even if you nearly blew chunks or pooped. And if you don't start, you don't get to see things like this, out on the road. 

W.W. Knight Nature Preserve shelter and pond

Sun-dappled path at W.W. Knight Nature Preserve

  
Be kind to each other. Be kind to yourself. -- V. 

Wednesday's stats:
Distance:  4.51 mi
Time:  39:47
Avg Pace:  8:49 min/mi
Calories:     528 C
Time 39:47